Godfather Advice Notes – No.2

Girls 2/423000

Your girlfriend buys you two ties for your birthday. One is red, the other blue. Whilst on the face of it innocent, this is a trap.

You say “Thank you darling, they’re lovely.”

[Always employ terms of endearment at random such as darling, my sweet, honeybun and avoid real names in case of mixing them up with those of previous girlfriends.]

Sensitive chap that you are you decide to wear one of the ties when you go out with friends that night to show your girlfriend how much you appreciate your present*. You decide on the red one for no particular reason.

Everything seems to have gone swimmingly but on your return home your girlfriend isn’t talking to you. Now what have I done? you ask yourself.

“What’s up sugar?” You ask her.

“Didn’t you like the blue tie then?” she says bitterly.

Solution

Either simply accept that girls lay these traps regularly.Or, give her the boot.

* You don’t – ties are really boring presents.